Saints Report #2 - September 16, 2018

I don’t even know where to begin with this edition of the New Orleans Saints.  Last year at this time, as the Saints started 0-2 for the fourth straight year, they looked like a Ball of Confusion.  This year they are in some kind of Psychedelic Shack with a 1-1 record.  The hapless and hopeless Cleveland Browns came to the dome and beat the Saints in pass, punt, run, but not kick.   

Zane Gonzalez is the kicker for the Browns and he missed 2 field goals and 2 extra points, enabling the Saints to squeak by 21-18.  The Browns outplayed the Saints in the other 2 phases of the game, but a big 4^th quarter interception by safety Marcus Williams led to a touchdown that put the Saints ahead 18-12.  That should have been it, but Ken Crawley got beat for an improbable long touchdown pass.  With the score 18-18, Gonzalez missed his second extra point.   The Saints drove for a game winning field goal and had to watch Gonzalez miss a long attempt that would have tied it. 

The last time Sean Payton met his old defensive coach Gregg Williams, the Saints torched the Rams, running up the score with impunity.  This time Williams had the upper hand, sacking Brees 3 times on third down.  Brees missed two touchdown passes that he would normally execute, Alvin Kamara and Michael Thomas carried the offense again, and the Saints basically won a game they shouldn’t have.  The Saints running game is dormant and their pass rush non-existent and these are the things that carried them through last year’s winning streak.

So, it’s a normal NFL year.  Just as I predicted Tampa Bay and Kansas City will meet in the Super Bowl after getting by Minnesota and Jacksonville in their conference finals.  Or I would have predicted if I understood the NFL.   

So now, the Saints are past their poisonous first two games and are off to Atlanta to play the 1-1 Falcons in a game that will leave the loser in last place in the division.  So, let me tell you what’s going to happen in Atlanta.

There will be traffic.  Many of the clogged streets will have Peachtree in their name.

That's all I can tell you

 

Saints Report # 11 - November 27, 2016

Welcome back Triple G. 

Great to see you in the Superdome again.

Do you die your hair with those cute little highlights?

You remember Drew Brees don’t you?

He’s about to slice and dice your defense to the tune of 28 of 36 for 310 yards and 4 touchdowns.

By the way, did you add that extra G to your name, or was that a parental decision?

I don’t think you’ve met Mark "Straightline" Ingram.

About twice a year he has a good game and he’s about to slash and dash your vaunted defense.

I don’t think you’ve met Michael Thomas either.

He’s just a rookie but he’s about to gash and mash you to the point of embarrassment for more than a third of Brees’ yardage.

You remember Zach Strief don’t you?

He’s still anchoring an offensive line that is going to push and mush your famous defensive line in their most dominant performance of the year. 

Of course you remember Sean Payton.

Your “affect the head” strategy cost Sean a year of his coaching life, and he’s going to make you pay for that today by designing a pounding to remember.

You remember Micky Loomis right?

He’d like those 2 draft choices back that your Bountygate cost him, because he could ill afford to lose draft choices, given that he’s rather hit or miss in the evaluation department.

You remember Tom Benson don’t you?

You were a major contributor to getting him that Lombardi trophy, and I’m sure he’s grateful, as we are all, but if you could slip Tom half a mil to pay back that fine, he’d probably get you a great deal on a used car.

Oh, and one more, this is Willie Snead.  He’ll be the salt in your wound today.  Don’t take it personally that he'll end with a better QB rating than Brees.

Finally, sorry to hear that you’ve not spoken to Sean Payton.  He’s about to punish you to the tune of a 49 – 21 “paybacks are hell” type of thrashing that we rarely see in the Superdome these days.  We haven’t fared too well against the Rams in recent years, but a 555 yard change is gonna come.  We’ll move to 5-6 and continue to give our fan base that slight glimmer of hope that makes them tune in.  We want to party like it’s 2009.  Remember?